Giving It Away to Keep It…Living a Christ Centered Life

I think most of us in the Church would agree that a Christ centered life is a gift worth sharing with others (a spiritually demanding gift I might add). Yet sharing of ourselves without condition or assurance is often challenging and difficult. Giving without concern for the self, and sharing through our vulnerability are rather alien concepts in today’s world – but so often that is how Jesus’ counter cultural teachings are perceived – outlandish! We live in a very individualistic society; one that teaches us to put ourselves first, seize as much power and control as possible, and a society that often teaches us to measure our self-worth based on the opinions of others. Think for one moment - how many times do we seek validation from outside sources? How many times do we base our success and failures on the reaction of our peers? This is just another form of self-centeredness and completely contrary to a life in Christ. Yet what are we supposed to do? We are after all human beings! Perhaps we should look deeper into what it means to live a Christ centered life.

We exist in a world in which we consistently experience a tug towards superficial achievements where success tends to be measured by worldly standards. Perhaps we have days in which we feel torn in several directions all at once. Those are the kinds of days in which I often feel it is everything I can do to take care of myself, much less give of myself to anyone else! It is hard not to put ourselves first in a society that teaches us might makes right, success is measured by how much worldly wealth we can accumulate, or how many goals we can accomplish in a day. Yet in contrast to the hustle and bustle of this world and it's standards, Jesus calls us to a life of complete and utter humility, poverty and a lifestyle of continuous self-giving (one without expectation of return or pay back). The counter culture love of God is radical in its nature. It knows nothing less than complete surrender and self-abandonment.

The very mystery and nature of God as Trinity celebrates self-abandoning love in diversity. And while we can debate and discuss the mystery of God, what is most important is to not lose sight of God’s pure benevolence; a gift that expects nothing in return. The economy of God is unconditional and ecstatic love for the other. In God there is no individual, but community. So what does that mean for us? Well, a life in Christ is all about acceptance of the self; the person God made us. It also means the acceptance of the beautiful diversity of all God’s people. The economy of God is not based on a fiduciary system, trade or the stock market. Instead the economy of God is the rock solid gift of life that is lived, shared and grounded in the community of faith. When we are initiated into the Body of Christ and immersed into the community of faith we die to our old selves and take on a new life, not only for ourselves, but for the sake of others as well. Just as the mystery of God is three divine “Persons” yet one being, so too do we become one with each other, yet remain personally valued and blessed with unique spiritual gifts. In other words, God calls us to build and rebuild relationships with others through the sharing of ourselves without condition. God invites us to celebrate our individual gifts as pieces of the puzzle that complement the community as a whole. Life in the community of the church recognizes that while we are diverse in nature, we need each other! A life in Christ is an immersion into unconditional love for God and our neighbor. Where many of us balk is that a genuine life in Christ requires nothing less than total self-sacrifice and self-abandonment. That is hard! Yet a life shared with others is a life that is constantly receiving the blessings of others and then selflessly passing along the gifts we receive. In the economy of God this exchange is a perfect cycle. But for human kind and our relationships, let’s just say we fall way short.

In this Ordinary time in the liturgical life of the church (the season of Pentecost), it is my sincere hope we will all continue to practice this cycle of self-giving love, even though we are far from perfect. The more we share of ourselves, the more vulnerable we all become as a community. It is in that vulnerability that sweet surrender occurs. It is in surrender that we find the meaning of unconditional love and service, sharing from our very poverty rather than excess.

Making Time for God

Most recently I had a meeting with a diocesan consultant at the former Catholic Convent of Richmond Hill, Richmond, Virginia. The convent was originally built after the War Between the States in the 1860’s. Situated on a hill overlooking the city, Richmond Hill's primary purpose was to watch over the city in careful, methodical and unceasing prayer. Richmond, like many southern cities was in utter chaos and destruction after its fall. The Southern troops and local inhabitants actually did most of the damage to the city as they fled the Union army. They burned all of the warehouses and anything else that might provide comfort and support for the enemy. To say the least, the city was in shambles and suddenly under Union control as well as marshal law. The sisters, who were moved to Richmond Hill by their bishop, had one mission – to pray without ceasing over the devastated city.

Richmond Hill, like so many monastic or former monastic facilities is a place that is rich and immersed in prayer. While Richmond Hill is no longer a convent, it is a place of spiritual retreat and solitude. So much sincere and faithful prayer has been lifted up to God within that small but beautiful compound; there is a genuine presence of stepping onto Holy Ground.

We all need respite from the daily grind of life. We all need a few moments to simply stop and pray and listen to that still small voice of God. We live in a fast paced world that demands immediate results, and as much of our time as it can steal. Work ethic has transformed in many places to ‘the more we do in a day, the more productive we are in that day.’ Never mind taking care of oneself spiritually, mentally, physically and emotionally; the world demands a price to function in our modern day society and if we don’t pay the piper then we are taught the consequence is utter failure and ridicule. What a terrible way to live! Many of us have experienced the challenge of balancing work, family and self-care. The first item that usually goes by the way side when we are under pressure is the one thing we need the most – healthy lives committed to a solid spiritual formation. Trust me, as ironic and strange as it may sound the church and her clergy, lay staff and volunteers often fall into the exact same trap. The church is made up of human-beings and not immune to our brokenness.

I learned a valuable lesson regarding my spiritual life and ministry during my brief stay at Richmond Hill. I learned just how easy it is to become so self-absorbed and distracted that we neglect our prayer life and spiritual growth. Standing, kneeling and sitting in a room that was so rich and immersed in prayer was not only incredibly refreshing and spiritually reinvigorating, it was also a blessing and reminder from God about my true priorities and needs.

Christ is the Incarnate God who abides in us whether we take time to recognize his presence or not. I encourage us all to seek out time and places to renew our lives and spirits. I encourage us all to enter into a life of intentional prayer and silence, even if it is for just a brief amount of time. It is amazing how even the briefest time spent in the presence of God has the ability to rejuvenate our lives, calm our spirits and reprioritize our lives in a most healthy manner. Life’s challenges will always be there to confront us as that is simply living life on life's terms. Yet when we take the time to enter Holy Ground we will emerge refined and better able to meet those challenges with a deeper faith and steadfast spiritual foundation. It is in the still silence and quietness of our hearts that we become grounded in God's love and compassion, and much better prepared to meet the daily grind that lies just around the corner.

Sticks and Stones May Break My Bones, but Words can be Brutal

Relationships are fundamental to our lives not only as Christians but as part of our basic human DNA as well. While relationships provide us with companionship, friendship and colleagues, they also provide us with numerous challenges. The church is certainly not exempt from the complex nature of relationships. A friend of mine used to say in reference to the diversity of human nature and personalities – “It takes all kinds to make up this world.” How very true is this statement when it comes to the complex make up of individual people. Of course what makes our personalities and individuality interesting is when we enter into relationships with others, or become a part of a larger group.

Church folks, especially the clergy often take their fair share of criticism and beatings at the hands (or should I say words) of disgruntled people. The natural reaction for most of us when confronted with difficult behavior is to become defensive or simply withdraw. Knowing this raises several questions, especially when it comes to life in the church. What do we do with the hurt and pain caused to us by others in the church? How do we as Christians transcend the malicious intent of gossip? How do we, the Body of Christ seek out reconciliation rather than revenge? These are difficult questions, but often the reality we face in the corporate community of faith.

From time to time random people outside the congregation approach me in the grocery store, mall, restaurant or some other public place in order to express and explain why they no longer attend church (It must be the collar!). Part of the mantle I bear upon my shoulders as an Episcopal priest is to be a magnet for the disenfranchised, hurt and lost. I listen to these folks as they share their plight and painful experiences in the church. Whether it is due to gossip, power struggles or parish politics, these folk’s stories have a common thread – they left their community of faith with a bitter and disgusting taste for life in the church. Most of these folks leave their church feeling battered and in desperate need of healing and recovery. Many folks seek God elsewhere, while others become so put off by the internal squabbles and unhealthy reactions that they simply drift along as non-active members who only grace the doors of the church when it is absolutely necessary. Is this the Christian life and fellowship that we are called to live? What kind of example are we setting for the world at large when all it ever witnesses is our internal feuds and fights?

We do hurt each other in the church, and often. While it is a sad fact, it is also the broken nature of human-beings to want control their environment, need to be right, and nurture ego-centric and dysfunctional behavior. In his book, Never Call Them Jerks, Arthur Paul Boers explains that unfortunately in the name of Jesus destructive mental health issues are all too often protected and enabled by well intentioned people in the congregation, providing the dysfunctional behavior with a genuine sense of empowerment and validation; no matter what the cost. Of course the clergy are certainly not exempt from these divisive self-serving needs either.

So the real question is – when these divisive, unhealthy and selfish actions occur, how do we deal with them in a healthy, accountable and loving manner? In other words, how do we reconcile with each other and stop the unhealthy cycle of dysfunctional behavior? The key - don't enable the difficult behavior while continuing to reach out and try to build bridges, not walls. Of course this sounds easy but in reality is much harder to do, especially when human emotions are factored into the situation. Yet to ignore difficult behavior or to retaliate only deepens and widens the chasm which separates us. After all, isn't that the nature of sin -to divide? Jesus tells us to go to a person who we have issues, and speak with them directly. He goes on to say if they will not listen then go back to them with a witness. If they still refuse to reconcile then take it to the church. If that doesn't work then we have to let them go in love so that we might move forward with healthy and joy filled spiritual lives. Unconditional love and Reconciliation are after all at the very heart of the Gospel, but so is accountability. As for me, I want to be a bridge, not a chasm. Life is so much better when we are able to let go, and let God!

God is our Divine Artist

Art is one of many creative and intimate avenues of spiritual expression. It is a tremendous (and even prayerful) outlet for our inner most feeling and thoughts. From humanity’s earliest existence, art has played an important role in humanity’s creative ability and process. There is a deep and innate part of each one of us that longs to capture and express energy and movement, light and dark, as well as emotions such as love and hate. Art is revealing and secretive. It tells a story that bursts forth onto a canvas, page, palate or molded clay; often in a unique and personal way. Art captures our likes and our dislikes. It tells others something about our inner most selves, and the mysterious story behind our eyes. When looking at a painting, a piece of sculpture or drawing we enjoy, often there is something (known or unknown) in that work which touches us in a deep and profound manner. Sometimes whether we like the piece of art or not, we find ourselves drawn into the life of the work; stimulated, captivated and even overwhelmed by what we find. In many ways it is our interpretation or the evoked emotion that gives that piece of art life, meaning and purpose.

We often forget that God is the divine artist, constantly creating and recreating life, the world and universe. God molded humanity out of the earth and then blew his holy breath into the sculpted clay, giving us life and substance. Filled with the creative life force of God’s breath, we too have an innate drive to create and find expression in the beauty of this world (whether we realize it or not).

Do we have a way, place or medium to release and exercise our creativity? This summer as many of us take vacation, go to camp or simply relax at home in the backyard, I encourage us to stop and look around at the vast and lovely creative work and energy of God. It is everywhere. Who knows, maybe we will be inspired to open up those tightly guarded places in our hearts and allow our creativity to bubble to the surface.

Love....Its Not Mere Lip Service

A well known actor was asked at a special Christian gathering to recite the 23rd Psalm. So, with great drama and flair, he mounted the stage and artfully articulated the vivid imagery of this familiar piece of Scripture. The people were entertained and in awe of his ability to articulate each word and to sprinkle just the right amount of inflection in key spots throughout the Psalm. Later in the same program, an elderly, respected woman of the community was asked to make some kind of contribution to the evening. She rose to the stage and apologized to the people because she could think of nothing else to share but a piece of Scripture she knew best; and you guessed it - the 23rd Psalm. Her voice cracked as she started, “The Lord is my shepherd.” She stumbled over her words, and the people had to strain to hear her low, monotone voice. Yet, there was a very real passion and sense of faith that resignated from her heart. She spoke the psalm as if it were something deeply internalized within her soul. Every monotne word was spoken in genuine affection for her love and gratitude to God. When she finished, there was not a dry eye in the house. The great actor climbed onto the stage and hugged the old woman and explained the difference. “I know the psalm,” he said, “but she lives the psalm.”

Believing what we live, and living what we believe. How many times have we looked at our spouse or someone else we are close to and apologized for failing to live up to a promise? Again! And how many times has that person(s) looked us in the eye and told us to save our apologies because ‘actions speak louder than words?’ I don’t know about other folks but when I find myself in this position I always feel spiritually rotten inside. I feel as if I dropped the ball by failing to follow through with my commitments. Or perhaps, and even more concerning, maybe there is no commitment or conviction in my words.

Actions do speak louder than words. We can make many claims in our lives; we can make promises galore; we can have the best intentions in the world, but unless we follow through with those deeds (no matter how admirable our sincerity and willingness) they count for nothing; nothing more than meaningless and hollow articulated sounds. Words are a most vital in our communication with one another. They have great power to bring us together or drive us apart. Words can bring peace and comfort, or they can bring war and conflict. Words have power; for both good and bad. Every single day words have the ability to open the encounters of our hearts and minds to new and exciting interpretations. In our daily lives words also have the ability to rob us of meaningful relationships. Words cannot stand alone. Unless there is substance, trust and action behind them, they are nothing more than meaningless verbiage that drive wedges between us, and those we love.

The Apostle John understood the need to not only speak the truth, but live it as well. In his first letter he wrote, “Little children, let us love, not in word or speech, but in truth and action.” Literally translated: "...let us love, not with lip service, but in truth and action." A colleague of mine when preaching often says in his opening prayer, “Lord, let me faithfully preach the Gospel today, and when necessary --- use words.” Each of us is called to live our lives as faithful Christians who read, digest and embrace God’s Holy Word. After all, Christ is the living Word of God; the way, the truth and the life. We can profess this all day long, but in the end do we practice what we preach? Do we put our faith in active motion and truly live as wholesome examples in Christ?

In his first epistle John maintains consistency with his Gospel. He emphasizes the importance of faith actions and deeds. For John, this is vital and relevant to our salvation. While love, truth and light are revealed in Christ they only become pertinent in our lives through active faith (deeds and actions). Many of us know how to talk the talk (for some of us talking has never been a problem), but do we know how to walk the walk?

These 50 days of Easter are about learning to both talk the talk as well as walk the walk. Easter presents us with multiple opportunities to encounter the Risen Lord, and like the Apostles, allow him to open our minds to his Word. Like the disciples after the resurrection, once we encounter the Risen Lord and inwardly digest his living Word, we can’t help but move into truthful and loving action.

The bottom line – it is easy to say we love others and want to reach out to them in reconciliation, kindness or thoughtful concern; but unless we seek them with truthful intentions and right actions our faith becomes stagnant and wrought with despair. Know Christ, but live Christ and make him known!

I Want to Walk with Jesus: Barefooted and Free!

Some of my fondest memories of growing up in the Deep South are forged from my youthful days of freedom; an innocent freedom born out of my dear affection for summer (despite the incredibly hot temperatures and near 100% humidity). The long lazy days, afternoon thundershowers and endless time playing outside (barefooted of course) until long after dark are as much a part of my spiritual formation as time spent in church. For many of us the outdoors is God’s vast cathedral, one that no work of brick and mortar can ever match. Summer is a time in which life thrives intensely, just before the sudden, necessary and natural cycle of fall’s decay announces the silent dormancy of winter.

Jesus’ life and ministry (most likely barefooted) was one that was fully thriving, growing and spreading throughout Galilee and Judah. Like a bright summer’s day full of life, thunder and seemly never ending, Jesus was in the prime of his mission when suddenly the winds of change shifted, and the darkness of winter abruptly arrived. Did he expect this change? Was he prepared for this sudden and abrupt transition? His divinity certainly understood the demands of his mission, but Jesus’ humanity railed against the bitter chalice filled with gloom and death. In the youth of his life a cold chill stirred the night air in the Garden of Gethsemane; a bone cutting coldness brought on by the kiss of betrayal. The thriving life of summer came to a deafening and eerie hush, as Jesus began his silent plight to winter’s barren cross.

The very life of God flows through us because Jesus sacrificed himself for us; spilling his precious blood so that our ravaged, lost and shattered spirits might be preserved from the oppressive bondage of sin and death. Through the love and faithfulness of Christ Jesus our Lord, in the midst of winters harsh, savage and barren coldness life and hope awoke. Jesus destroyed the black emptiness of the desolate tomb, transforming the gloom of that early Easter morning into light and joyful reunion. Nothing of this world, not even death, could contain the Lord of all Creation. As hard as it is to sometimes believe, nothing of this world can separate us from the grace and love of our Lord Jesus Christ. The cold season of winter will still fall across the landscape of our lives; the snow and hard ice will form on our hearts from time to time; and the life around us will still feel desolate and barren on occasion; that is simply life on life’s terms in this broken world. The good news is that spring will come, flowers will bloom and our lives will feel the warm hope that gently blows across our shattered hearts and dispirited dreams. And if we listen very carefully, we will hear the sounds of an eternal summer; a delightful enunciation of grace beckoning us to cast aside our heavy burdens in order to run forever, barefooted and free.

Leaving Loose Ends Untied.

An Arab chief once told a story of a spy who was captured and then sentenced to death by a general in the Persian army. This general had the strange custom of giving condemned criminals a choice between the firing squad and the ‘big, black door.’ As the moment for execution drew near, the spy was brought to the Persian general, who asked the question, “What will it be: the firing squad or the big, black door?”The spy hesitated for a long time. It was a difficult decision. Finally, after much fearful deliberation he chose the firing squad.Moments later shots rang out confirming his execution. The general turned to his aide and said, “They always prefer the known way to the unknown. It is characteristic of people to be afraid of the undefined. Yet, we gave him a choice.”The aide said, “What lies beyond the big black door?”“Freedom,” replied the general. “But very few people have the courage to dare and risk opening that door, much less walk through it’s portal.”

Fear of the unknown; that is what we find on this glorious Easter morning. Mark’s account of the resurrection is one that makes us all some what uncomfortable and uneasy. After sixteen chapters Mark simply leaves us with the women running as fast as they can to escape the empty tomb (and of course an angelic encounter!). His Gospel narrative leaves us in desperate need of closure. The last thing we actually see are the women high-tailing it out of the garden in great fear. I don’t think they had any problem in choosing the door over the firing squad (metaphorically speaking). They ran as fast as they could back into their own comfort zones and the comfortable reality it provided them. After all, someone or something had moved that giant stone from the entrance into the tomb and Jesus’ body was nowhere to be found. The removal of the body must have been devastating enough for Jesus’ friends, not to mention all of the mystery surrounding that early morning encounter.

But what if the women had found Jesus’ body in the tomb? What if every thing had worked out nice and neat the way they expected? What if there was no shocking surprise or heavenly encounter? What if there was no risk involved and every thing went as planned? What if there were no choices to make beyond (say) what spices to anoint Jesus’ corpse; or no decisions beyond how to remove the stone from the entrance? If every thing had gone as expected for the three women on that first Easter morning; if they had found their closure by anointing the body of Jesus; and if they had tied up all of their loose ends - we wouldn’t be here today. Mark, the brilliant and inspired evangelist he was – intentionally left the Gospel ending open and loose ends untied.

Many of us like to have everything wrapped up nice and tidy in an orderly and explainable fashion. But guess what? That is not the nature of God and it is certainly isn’t characteristic of a life in Christ! God sent the women to tell the disciple’s of Jesus’ resurrection, without even giving them even the tiniest glimpse of the risen Lord! Mark leaves us wondering if they metaphorically chose the firing squad or the big black door; because the evangelist tells us they ran away in fear and said nothing (Nothing) to anyone. The greatest event in creation occurs (the Resurrection) and fear, doubt and ambiguity appear to win out; or do they?

The angel told the women that Jesus had risen and already gone to Galilee. The disciples and followers of Christ would certainly encounter him there. In the end, God’s grace will always transcend our faithlessness. In the end, God’s love will always overcome our fear. And in the end, God’s triumph of life eternal will always conquer death. Nevertheless, the choice of what kind of life we choose to lead is important to our quality of faith and spirituality.

We like to know what is coming next in life - don’t we? Most of us don’t care for surprises. We aren’t about to choose “the big black door” if we are afraid. It is amazing that we will choose self- destructive and sometimes deadly paths even though we know they are roads to nowhere; but in a sick manner, we at least can rationalize and are content with the certain knowledge of where they lead!

Often when confronted with such choices in life we find ourselves frozen in fear and indecisive. It’s a difficult and unfortunate position when we stand with one foot in yesterday and another in tomorrow. In the words of one theologian, “We crucify ourselves between two thieves: on the one side is regret for yesterday, and on the other is fear of tomorrow;” - two thieves that rob our lives of so much joy. That is one wretched place to exist my dear friends. A life of fear is one of sorrow, resentment and much regret. Yet its our choice isn’t it?

For one moment I ask us to think about those fear filled times in our lives; think back on the joy as well as opportunities that fear has caused us to miss. Touch those wounds received by life. Feel the ridges and contours of those bitter scars. In the light of the resurrection, are we willing to risk opening our hearts just a little, even though every fiber of our being rails against the hurt that could take place in that vulnerable moment? The resurrection gives us another chance at living life to its fullest potential without the overwhelming and daunting fear. Jesus rose from the grave and bought for us with his own precious blood a renewed hope and new shot at life. The risen Lord beacons to us - leave behind those consuming fears, rejoice in the power of God’s redeeming love, and don’t worry about what we don’t or can’t see (untied, loose ends). Freedom despite life’s uncertainties is what the resurrection in Mark’s Gospel is all about – freedom; freedom to embrace what lies in the unknown without worry or stress. Christ is calling us on this glorious Easter morn to walk with him down a path named – Faith. It is faith that leads to truth and it is the truth (as Jesus tells us) that will set us free.

So Mark reminds us that a life in Christ Jesus is one that thrives in the gray areas of life and embraces the unknown. True spiritual growth only occurs in the ambiguity of risk and the acceptance of change. Spiritual maturity occurs when we faithfully step through the big black door, even though we know not what awaits us behind its mystery. But by stepping through the door of faith and embracing the risen Christ we can let go of our regrets of yesterday, as well as those phantom fears of tomorrow. We can then live my sisters and brothers- truly live! We can live a full life (with all of its challenges) with faith, joy and hope in the present!

Today Christ has risen!!! Today we have a renewed hope, a new covenant with God and an assurance of freedom from the bondage of sin and death. Today, we are bathed in the glowing light of the resurrection and brought through that mysterious door that leads to eternal life