A Godless World without Conscience

The recent discovery that the Syrian government used chemical weapons during this period of civil upheaval and unrest is absolutely inexcusable. Conventional warfare is bad enough, but to use weapons of mass destruction is appalling, as well as wicked. How many innocent people suffered agonizing deaths at the hands of their own government? Weapons of mass destruction have no conscience or ability to pick and choose whom to affect, they destroy everything that they come in contact with, including the innocent and those caught in the crossfire of conflict. It breaks my heart to think of the blameless families, especially children who have suffered and died at the hands of such cruel and evil actions. What kind of world do we live in where with the push of a button hundreds of thousands of lives can be obliterated from the face of the earth? Nuclear, chemical and biological weapons are agents of mass destruction that have the ability to not only wipe out life as we know it, but destroy our planet as well. Do we no longer have any respect for God and God’s creation? Can’t we at least find a common denominator in the fact that the earth is our fragile island home and needs to be nurtured? Yet in the name of power, greed and might we will use such weapons to achieve our goals. Look at the cost!

Red! All I See is Red!

Red! All I see is red! I am so angry I could breath fire!

Ever felt this way? Chances are we have all allowed our emotions to lead us to this place. Anger though, is a perfectly normal human emotion. Healthy anger propels us through intense situations and allows us not to become bogged down in the mire. Expressed in a healthy manner anger is not a bad trait. However if one constantly uses anger as a tool to manipulate, threaten or bully, that is a whole different story.

Jesus often became angry and displeased with his peers, colleagues and the social/religious system of his day. He became so angry to see Money Changers in the temple that he went on a tirade and turned over all their tables, scattering coins everywhere. To ice the cake, he drove those same Money Changers out of the temple with a whip. Now that is what I call seeing red! But this is Jesus. He is supposed to be God Incarnate. He is supposed to be perfect in every way. He is supposed to be without sin! Yet Jesus’ anger was justified. He used this emotion to clean out his Father’s house of a band of raceteers and thieves. Jesus’ anger propelled him to purify the temple. Donald McKim tells us “The wrath of God is an expression of the righteousness of God in relation to human sin, and its just punishment.” So Jesus (The second person of the Holy Trinity) remained perfect in everyway since he was in the Father and the Father was in him.

Still, what about our anger? We as humans tend to use anger for our own selfish purposes or we lash out when hurt.

I remember ninth grade well. A group of bullies had pestered me all the way through eighth grade and were now continuing the cycle. For such a long time I tolerated their bullying although it made me fearful and angry. I was afraid to reach out for help. I was afraid of confrontation. And I was afraid of this group of boys. Finally one of them pushed me over the edge and I went ballistic. While I never drew a fist or threw a punch, I lashed out at them in anger over the way they treated me. This suddenly changed the whole dynamic. They soon quit bullying me as I had propelled myself through the despair and fear. I felt free and liberated from the year and a half oppression. That is an example of anger used in a healthy manner, although I waited far to long to take action. I was spiritually ill from stuffing my anger down deep into my being.

Often we deny or stuff our anger down deep within us and refuse to acknowledge its presence. When we do this we become spiritually ill and sick. The anger churns around inside us and eventually becomes something far worse, resentment. Resentment is a dark and corrosive blackness that destroys the soul. It blots out the light of God. It eats away at us as it gradually becomes worse. To complicate matters, we often nurse our resentments, feeling justified and wallowing in their fetid destruction. Resentments cause us to become self-destructive, alienated from our fellows and spiritually hallow. They cause us to lash out in anger over the simplest things and to become hostile to those around us. Anger left unchecked is a deadly adversary that will destroy us from the inside out. It is never all right to use our anger as a tool to intentionally hurt the innocent, or as a way of drawing selfish attention to oneself.

Some folks have quick tempers and that is a spiritual challenge that needs to be addressed. Quick tempers usually are gut reactions to a situation or topic. When angry it is much better to step back and create a space to think and pray, and the respond to the situation or topic rather than merely react.

Healthy anger propels us through a situation, while unhealthy anger makes us sick. It is important to not let anger turn into resentment. When it pops up, it is also important to acknowledge anger as an emotion, and deal with it properly and appropriately.   

I was Born on the Wrong Side of the Railroad Tracks

Why on earth do you live over there? That was one of the first questions I was asked when I began my ministry in Richmond, Virginia some nine years ago. Apparently I lived on the wrong side of the James River – the south side rather than the north side. Immediately the feelings of inadequacy and inferiority washed through my mind. I flashed back to childhood memories of the same kind of scenario.

As a child I was raised on the “other” side of the railroad tracks. One might say, “The wrong side of the tracks,” ironically, the south side of Augusta, Georgia. I was also raised as a “Cradle Episcopalian” yet as a child attended a Baptist school. Still, because I was not the right denomination, I was singled out and separated from many of the students in my class.

Isn’t it interesting how we as a people naturally build up walls and dividers that separate us from one another? Isn’t it interesting how we label one another due to the simplest circumstances such as geographical location, sexuality, race, religious affiliation, denominational affiliation, socio-economic status and etc?

The act of labeling is painful and causes much internal strife. It is cruel and unjust, yet it is a large part of our social fabric. In much of today’s society it matters where we live, how much money one makes, our genealogy, sexuality and even religious affiliation. Labeling creates embarrassment and frustration for those it affects. Labeling is cruel, hurtful and wrong. It immediately classifies a person as “less than” by those in society who set the social, economic standards and norms in life.

Labeling takes many nasty forms. It affects all of us whether we like it or not. I’m as guilty of labeling as anybody else. I’ll never forget standing in downtown Augusta years ago. I was minding my own business along with my family. We were enjoying looking at the artwork on Artists Row. While standing outside on the sidewalk a man who was obviously a street person approached me. He saw my clerical collar and that is what drew him to me. Before he could utter a single word I had already made up my mind that this “bum” wanted money to buy alcohol. Wow! Could I have not been more wrong regarding the matter? Before the man spoke I quickly told him that I was so sorry but had no money and couldn’t help him. I’ll never forget the perplexed and even hurt look in the man’s eyes. There he stood all dirty and dingy. His hair was matted and probably hadn’t seen a comb in quite sometime.  His shoes were literally on their last thread and he walked toward me with a slight limp and insecure step. Rather than ask for money the man said, “Father, I don’t want any money. My name is James and I too was once a spiritual man of God. All I want is for you to say a prayer for me. Will you please say a prayer for me Father?”

As one can imagine I stood there dumbfounded and embarrassed. I had labeled this man as a dredge on society, seeking only the financial resources he could find to buy alcohol. I quickly apologized to him and we said a prayer together. My instinctive nature was to label and categorize this person simply by the way he looked and how he lived. I didn’t know his story and probably didn’t even consider asking him to share. I simply assumed he was a street person and in doing so realized I categorized all such people into one unappealing class.

The man left without asking for a dime. All he wanted was a prayer; a simple prayer from a priest he happened to see standing on the sidewalk.

Labeling is something that is taught. It is a learned behavior that many of us either experience while growing up or are influenced by others. The painful look in that man’s eyes reminded me of my own painful experiences and how I had become numb and conveniently forgotten the adverse affects such actions have on others. These are learning experiences that are tough and even painful, yet important if we wish to break the vicious cycle of labeling our fellows.

Yet we can take comfort in the fact that our Lord Jesus Christ was raised on the “wrong side of the tracks” as well. Jesus was raised in Nazareth. We hear it written in Scripture, “What good could come out of Nazareth?” Even Jesus was painfully labeled and looked down upon because of his geographical abode. Of course this did not affect our Lord’s ministry and love of the poor, the outcast and the marginalized. Jesus often associated with those in society labeled as sinners. He never allowed his own personal experiences of being labeled to stop him from crossing the boundaries (or should I say tracks) of society.

God sent his only Son into the world to save the world, not condemn the world. So why should we condemn those we do not understand? Why should we judge those who are broken, marginalized or simply come from the “wrong” section of town? Who are we to place labels on any one. Christ calls us to look into our own hearts and repent of our own sins. We all carry spiritual baggage and debris. None of us are any better than the other. We are all God’s children and we each have a right to be in this world.

Shakespeare said, “All the world’s a stage, all the men and women merely players.” He forgot to mention that we are sometimes the chief critics. It is easy to see the flaw in every person, every situation and label them accordingly. What I have learned over the years is that there is a bit of good in the worst of us and a bit of bad in the best of us. When we judge others we are placing labels on God’s handiwork. Essentially what we are saying is that we know better than God.

"Still Water Runs Deep."

After years of neglect, a good friend of mine found himself in much need of dental work. Since his teeth were in such deplorable shape, he made multiple visits to the dentist. As he sat in the dentist chair, anxiety flowing through his being, he would do what most of us do and that is to take in his environment. On one particular occasion as he sat in his usual spot, he noticed a large poster hanging on the wall. This poster captured his attention and would soon become a mantra for his life.

The poster hung right beside the dental chair and depicted an ocean scene. On the surface of the water, under a black and turbulent sky, the sea was experiencing a violent storm. The water was crashing down upon itself in huge waves as rain battered the oceans surface. Wind was viciously driving the seawater in various directions. It was a horrific storm on the ocean. However, as the water became deeper the storm had much less affect. Finally at the bottom of the poster the water was absolutely still. Fish were swimming safely around, completely oblivious to the raging storm above. There was writing on the poster that became my friend’s mantra. It read, “Still water runs deep.”

“Still water runs deep.” This is a powerful image and metaphor for those of us whose spirits constantly seem to be raging like the storm on the ocean’s surface. We all experience spiritual turmoil in our lives. There are experiences in life that seem to batter our beliefs and try our faith. Anxiety runs ramped and our trust in God is challenged. We may feel tossed about helplessly without any direction on the violent seas of life.  We need an anchor, but the presence of God seems distant and remote. How can we survive under such turmoil? How can we exist and live a meaningful life when we are so full of anxiety, fear, doubt and uncertainty?

Sadly many of us live life under these conditions every day. We never feel safe, settled or at peace. Something always stirs our anxiety and fear. The winds of doubt cut right through us as we try to simply manage our daily lives. Will the ravaging storm ever be calmed? Will the sea of life that I exist ever settle down? These are important questions of faith.

Life on life’s terms is a role of the dice. All we can do is live our lives to the best of our ability, and then try to cope with whatever comes our way. This is where the storms originate. Without a firm spiritual grounding in Christ we are left to the violent elements that upheave life, sending us into downward spirals. Yet when we are spiritually fit, the storms may rage on the surface, but deep down in our hearts “Still water runs deep.” In other words we are spiritually anchored and calm.

Living a life of strong spiritual fortitude doesn’t just magically happen. It is not something we are born with either. A life that is spiritually mature and able to withstand the assaults of the world takes molding and shaping over time. Deep spirituality requires practice and commitment. We accomplish this through our daily spiritual habits and practices. Over time we develop an ongoing relationship with God that is natural and rhythmic. When life’s crisis’ pop up we don’t have to blurt out some “Hail Mary” prayer. Rather we are in relationship with God and our faith and trust allow us to go deeper than the fear and anxiety that seek to unravel our lives. “Still water runs deep.” Our spirits have a calmness and depth to them that allow us to navigate the storms of life. We come to understand that God is in control of our lives and we look to follow his will. We know that while there will always be discomfort and pain in life, for that is unavoidable, we also know that Christ is there too. Our spirits run deep in the love and grace of God. Sure we may become rattled at times but then again we are human beings!

I encourage each of us to practice the spiritual principles of prayer and the reading of Scripture. If we do this on a consistent basis we will find that our relationship with Jesus strengthens and deepens. Before we know it we will find ourselves at a place where “Still water runs deep.”

  

Am I Beyond the Reach of God's Grace?

The young man stood in the center of the barren living room staring at the dirty and dusty hardwood floors. They were sticky from all the spilled beer, and his bare feet stuck to its surface if he stood in one place too long. The smell of the air reeked of stale beer and old cigarettes. The walls, once full of vibrant life portrayed in photographs now lay bleak and desolate. Only memories of the good times of the past existed, now hopelessly vanished from time. A mountain of empty beer cans ironically lay neatly stacked in the corner of the room as if they were a sacred monolith to his god.

The young man’s hands shook as he took another swig of his beer. The shakes were awful. If he didn’t get some alcohol in his system soon he would begin the violent tremors that foreshadowed the DT’s. He hated his life and what it had become. He never envisioned his twenties as this hellish wasteland. His appearance was that of someone twice his young age, although he wouldn’t know since he refused to look in the mirror at the horror he had become over these past few years.

He moved to the bathroom and picked up the razor whose blade hadn’t been changed for nearly a year. The toothpaste tube was torn open as he tried to get every ounce he could from the container. Then for the very first time, in what seemed like an eternity, he looked in the mirror and loathed what stared back at him.  A tear rolled down his cheek. “Life wasn’t fair!” he exclaimed as he struggled to choke down that first sip of much needed alcohol. My how he hated and loved this stuff, both at the same time. He felt he was beyond the point of help and lost forever, condemned to wander this alcoholic desert forever.

He moved to the bedroom scrapping together pennies in order to buy his next drink. Who would ever have thought that a penny could be worth so much? But for those who suffer from addiction one cent was worth a million dollars. He stumped his toe on the unmade bed. Who knew the last time the sheets had been washed or changed. But the young man didn’t care. As he let out a few colorful explicatives he took another sip of the valuable liquid that would enable him to get through yet another worthless day. This was hell he thought. It had to be, for no existence could be this bad.

There are times in which we all feel lost, as if our lives are out of the reach of God’s grace. Isolation takes over and we feel all alone in a world that has so many cruel twists and turns. Anger rules our lives and we find our resentments cut us off from the light of God.  Experiencing this kind of self-isolation and bitterness towards life is a terrible way to exist. Perhaps like the young man in the story we feel abandoned by God and misunderstood by the world, seeking something to fill the hole that exists in our soul. Perhaps we feel alienated from God and a spiritual cast away.

But there is good news! God’s hope in us is never lost. Not even for the young man in the story. While we may give up on God, God never gives up on us. Jesus experienced complete abandonment from the Father so that he might know the depths of despair that we sometimes find ourselves.

The young man in the story would go on to get sober and find a new profound relationship with God. He realized that it was not God who abandoned him, but he who abandoned God.

Why are we so ready to jump ship when we feel God is not listening to our prayers? Why do we take the attitude of unworthiness of God’s grace? Perhaps grace is just too good to be true. We can’t buy it or earn it, we simply have to accept it, as the young man in the story would eventually discover.

One of our greatest character flaws is nothing less than selfishness and self-centeredness. We are a people who want what we want when we want it. Modern technology has only intensified this defect of character. Self will run riot easily takes place in our heads when we feel like God is allusive or simply not present. Occasionally we turn to other substances such as alcohol or drugs in order to fill the desolate places in our lives.

A God center life takes daily practice. It doesn’t just happen by snapping our fingers. How can we expect to communicate with God in prayer if we only pray when we need something? A life grounded in God helps us overcome the selfish needs that often drive our lives. A relationship with Christ helps us conquer our resentments and allows us to stop resisting and freely accept God’s loving grace.

No matter where you find yourself today, remember this: Grace is always available. It is freely given yet must be freely received. Finally the real truth is that absolutely none of us are beyond the grasp of God’s grace.